Bitchin' Time!!!!

It's been so long since I've written something about my workplace. Well I guess every working place will have someone we will call "Biatch" and without them the work place will be so so BORING! Lucky me, We have one here!!

The nick that i'm giving to this one : Flower. Cos her name is a flower (Donald Duck's Gf Name)

I was warned before I even stepped into this company to be aware of this woman. She sits downstairs so she's kinda left out (she asked for it) hahhahaha I shouldn't write too much in just one day. So once in a while I will update about her cos once in a while she will "stir shit" for us. Oh yah, she's also called "Stir Shit Stick" (kau see kwan)

Not long after I joint this company, it was my colleague's birthday. So we wanted to surprise her with flowers and cake. So we gotto sneak the cake up. UNFORTUNATELY, when they brought the cake up, the flower saw the cake and she knew that she wasn't invited. (You know ah, she don't wanna pay but she wanna makan cake wor. Cheapskate!) So just like how we expected it, she wrote a memo (like so powderful eh? can keluar memo wan-cos she is secretary cum admin cum hr for KL office) supported by HR director, saying that some of us came late to work. But there was a memo not long ago being issued saying that if we come late, as long as we cover back the minutes that we're late it's okay. So ding dong ding dong, email shoot here and there at the end her boss supported her. And she so called won the battle. And after that she EKSYENLY told the mgr here " I'm already 14 years here. NOt so easy to DIE wan". You see la.....do i need to say more?

And she's like Drew Barrymore in 50 first date? Just that she is WORST than that. I have repeated myself so many times saying that "I DON'T SPEAK HOKKIEN". But somehow I think she purposely choose to speak to me in Hokkien. You know what to do when you actually meet someone like this? IGNORE! Cos you dunno how to hear and speak Hokkien ma! Ignore her until she speak in the language that you understand la! haha (shhhhh....wa beh hiau kong hokkien wah, tapi wa eh hiau tia tompok tampok)

The other day she called me:
Sasha: Hello?
Flower: Sasha, you be a good girl okay? Pok Pek Pok Pek (in hokkien: You don't say anything okay?You help me see if Jo is at her place or not.)
Sasha: FLOWER! I Don't understand Hokkien!
Flower: Of sorry ah ..Pok Pek Pok Pek (in hokkien: i forgot that you cannot understand hokkien. You have to remind me samo okay?)
Sasha: HUH????
Flower: you help me see if JO is at her place or not.
Sasha: she's on leave la.
Flower: Yakah? Why she's on leave ah?
Sasha: I dunno wor...
Flower: ok ok KAMSIAH LU AH!
Click. Turn ard and told T.

Sasha:Eh you know ah this flower called and asked me if Jo is at her place or not.
T: Eh why she ask. the leave form is with her ma.
Sasha: huh? means she will know la who is on leave
T: yeah.

Fone ring.
T: hello?
Flower: T ah! You know where is Jo ah?
T: She's on leave ma. She gave you the leave form right?
Flower : pok pek pok pek.
T: BYE!

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The other day she questioned me, what happened to me cos I was on emergency leave and on mc the next day.
Flower: YOUR SON FEVER AH!
Sasha: not fever. Diarrhea and vomiting
Flower: OH i tot he fever!....Why he fever ah? Why u take MC.
Sasha: Not fever. Diarrhea and vomit. I also kena ma.
Flower: Oh . Pok Pek Pok Pek in Hokkien
Sasha: .... (walk away)

Fone ring.

Flower: SASHA . Pok Pek Pok Pek in Hokkien
Sasha: Flower. I told you . I don't understand Hokkien.
Flower: Oh. You have to remind me again. SASHA LEI LAI SEE AH? (sasha, you tershit ah?)
Sasha: Huh? What LAI SEE? Diarrhea la.
Flower: So U told GM that you diarrhea because you drank the water in office ah?
Sasha: No ak. I told you at i got it from my son mah. My son never drink the water here also.
Flower: OH (saying out loud so GM can hear her) SO MEANS YOU NEVER LAI SEE AFTER YOU DRINK THE WATER HERE LA?????
Sasha: No but other ppl here also diarrhea maybe they...
Flower: FOR YOUR INFORMATION HOR!!! MY HOUSE ALSO USING THE SAME WATER SUPPLIER LOR!! MY FAMILY ALL SO HEALTHY ,NO PROBLEM!!!!!! *click*
Sasha: *Scratch head*
Other coliks: Flower called you ah?
Other coliks: What she said
Sasha: Bli Bla Bli Bla.
Other coliks: Hahaha MUST BE Buy here Free at home la! So support the supplier! Hahahah

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We went to celebrate someone farewell and like usual we didn't invite her. UNFORTUNATELY she saw us coming back. So drama again la..So everyone pakat-ed and said that we went to normal chinese restaurant to makan curry mee only. And then I went down to get my stationary (oh yah , stationary can only be collected on Mondays and Fridays. And guess what, the store room where she stores the stationary is like 10 steps away from her desk and there's only like *count hand jari and kaki jari* of us only).

Flower: Sasha. I want to ask you something. Just now I ask Ja why I'm not invited for any occasion. Is there something between me and you all ah?
Sasha: (YEAH!! BIG PROBLEM WOMAN!) No ak. Got problem meh? Who told you?
Flower: Neh... Ja said you all have problem with me wor...
Sasha: (sense something fishy) HUH??? How come I dunno wan? You should ask Ja ma. If she really said got problem, then you should ask her!
Flower: Yalor . I will ask her later. So there's no problem between you and me ah?
Sasha: What problem? *blink eyes*
Flower: No problem hor?
Sasha: I only worked her for 2 months only ma...won't have any problems wan...(yet)
Flower: Good!

So I went up and said :
Sasha: GUYS! I have announcement! Bli Bla Bli Bla
Coliks: AHH??????
Ja: Swear to god!! I never said such thing! Why she frame me like dat.
Sasha: I know I know! I sense something was not right so I questioned her back and she cannot answer.
Ja: I go down and see what she said.

Ja pretend to walk pass flower.

Flower: Ja! I have something to tell you!
Ja: Yes flower? *blink blink eyes*
Flower: Nolah. I want to tell you something. Just now i told Sasha, you said that we have problem.
Ja: Flower....why you said like that? I was joking when you talked to me this afternoon. Actually i never hear what you're saying, I just said maybe la and walked away.
Flower: Yeah lor I know you're joking. I just want to tell you that I told Sasha..
Ja: Okay? So how?
Flower: Nothing la.

Hahahahaha you see. What dirty tricks she play every single day. But seriously without her I think we will be very bored. Hahaha See how she gave me idea to entertain you guys?